I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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