Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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