how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Someone signed my nipple.
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