the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Randomize
