wat bout pragnant strippers??
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Randomize
