you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
