i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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