my mouth tastes like poor choices
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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