I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
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