This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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