Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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