Where is the hickey?
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize