went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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