We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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