So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.