Someone shit on the floor
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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