he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
