shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
50% drunk capacity currently
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
