Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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