i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
