I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
