Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
