I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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