I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
