I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
