I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize