so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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