How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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