The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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