lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
