No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
