You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
