i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I skipped work to stalk him.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize