i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
