Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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