Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
