You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?