Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
God, I missed his penis.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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