I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
