What did we do last night that was yellow?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize