the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
