Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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