Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize