Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
