goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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