Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize