You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
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