I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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