cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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