He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize