it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Randomize
